Thoughts During Movies: “Tomorrowland”

It’s that time again! Tomorrowland, the new film from Brad Bird, just premiered in theaters, so I thought it was only right to check out the film myself, and write down my thoughts I had during the film. Of course, as always, SPOILERS AHEAD. You’ve been warned. Now, you can’t sue me. Ha. Let’s get to it!

• Nice opening castle/futuristic world. Still no Tron: Legacy, but a solid second.
• GEORGE CLOONEY.
• Way to make me immediately love your movie, decision makers who made the 1964 World’s Fair begin the film.
• Athena…writing that down in my list of baby names…that I totally don’t have.
• Loving the dress. GURL, YOU KILLIN’ IT!
• Following her, onto it’s a small world, then illegally jumping into a boat? You’re like 9. Simmer down, eat an ice cream, and calm it.
• Small World has a secret drop?! I’m assuming we didn’t get that in Florida because of the water table issue. Damn you, water table!
• The way he just HAPPENS upon Athena again is ridiculous. Then again, I am thinking this new dimension is totally believable, so I’m just going to shut up.
• If she interrupts George Clooney one more time, so help me…
• I take that previous thought back. She was great in The Longest Ride. Remember how a movie starring Alan Alda premiered last month?!
• Judy Greer got a single second of screen time. A SINGLE SECOND. That is disgusting. I am appalled.
• Tim McGraw is in this, ’cause sure. I like to imagine Tim singing “Diamond Rings and Old Barstools” on set, as George swayed back and forth. #Allegedly
• NASA tie-in is pretty awesome, not going to lie
• That guy in the police department = half the kids at my old high school *shivers*
• “We saved a seat for you.” Okay, this became a little too Scientology for my liking…
• Soaking Wet Star #1
• Michael Giacchino is killing it, once again, with this score (Side Note: I’m listening to it as I write this, and one tune is called “Boat Wait, There’s More.” I LOVE PUNS.)
• Things you should never trust: Websites stuck in 2003, Sci-fi based stores, Keegan Michael-Key in a fat suit.
• Athena is kicking some major butt. If the Kids’ Choice Awards still gave out “Best Butt-Kicker,” she would at least get a nomination.
• An 11 year old is driving a car. I’m a 19 year old and go-karts frighten me.
• GEORGE CLOONEY.
• Y’all, George has been standing in the rain for 10 minutes and I’m really sad.
• Soaking Wet Star #2 and #3
• These robots are way too Stepford Wife-y for my liking. Oh my god, Faith Hill was in the remake and Tim McGraw is in this. Why are they attracted to films with scary robots?!
• Soaking Wet Star #4 and #5
• ATHENA BRINGING IN THAT CHEVY LIKE A BOSS.
• I appreciate that a satellite way to travel is hidden behind a local TV affiliate. That seems safe. Understandable too. I mean, can you imagine putting that at the ABC Studios in NYC. The trouble George Stephanopoulos would get into is palpable.
• (Editor: Google translate *ahem*)
• Paris! J’aime comment ils se déplaçaient le film à France. Un point d’intrigue très amusant.
• Mon suspension de l’incrédulité se termine lorsque les civils parisiens prennent juste des photos de la fusée sortant de la Tour Eiffel. Si cela était moi, je serais d’appeler la police tandis que dans la postion de fœtus.
• Si vous utilisez Google translate pour lire ces pensées, alors voici une blague pour vous. Je adore manger des crevettes. Personne ne saura jamais ce que je disais!
• Tomorrowland has let themselves go…wow. They should really try out a juice cleanse.
• If this aesthetic doesn’t show up in the parks, I will be devastated. As devastated as when Smash was cancelled.
• This “Ball O’ Future” is ripe for a ride. I mean, how cool is that?! I want to rise into a platform and see the world ending! Maybe not the last part. Maybe just rise into a platform to see a new episode of Scandal!
• Can you imagine?! Hey, btdubs, need ya to save the world. Thanks, you’re a doll! kbai.
• I smell a fight sequence, however, I did not expect that sequence to half take part on a beach.
• Athena needs to be anywhere and everywhere from now on, along with Casey. Two strong, kick butt females who don’t sing the same song over and over and over, across all mediums. LOOKING AT YOU, ELSA.
• I’ve never seen George cry so beautifully. I mean, it’s no Shailene Woodley crying under water, but it’s still beautiful.
• I’ll miss you, Athena! Forever and Always! *sobs in theater*
• Soaking Wet Star #6
• AWWWW, they were talking to new recruiters the whole time!
• Wait, why are all the recruiters 12 and hipsters? Do they even know what vinyl is? How do they like their coffee? DO THEY THINK BROOKLYN IS A MAJESTIC PLACE?!
• Tim McGraw dressed as an astronaut-esque human is my new phone wallpaper. Ridiculous.
• GEORGE CLOONEY.

I can’t recommend this film enough. Reviews were iffy about it, so I went in with lower expectations, but this is one of the best live-action Disney movies I’ve seen in years. AND I LOVED MCFARLAND, USA. Even if you aren’t into sci-fi or Marvel (*raises hand*), see it on the biggest screen you can find, with the best sound, and enjoy every single second. Remember, GEORGE CLOONEY.

Tomorrowland is now in theaters!