Pity the poor Disco Yeti. Touted as the animatronic to end all animatronics; jet powered with an amazing range of motion; guaranteed to scare the living daylights out of thousands of roller coaster riders on Expedition Everest daily; and yet, seemingly forever frozen in a state of disrepair since just a few months after opening. So what’s a Yeti to do?

How about a parody music video:

Did that have you rolling on the floor laughing? It did me.

Actually, there’s a bit of good news for the Yeti. He’s currently scheduled for the Operating Room. A scrim surrounds him and work is going on underneath the skirt. Alas, the news is not all good. He’s not getting the heart transplant he needs. Instead, the word is they are merely tying some strings on to his limbs. He’s getting a Pinocchio makeover. Adding a marionette effect is cheaper than the fix he needs to return the full range of motion; a fix that holds no promise of working any longer than the original version did.

So that’s the compromise we’re left with. Get the Pinocchio Yeti t-shirts ready.